Hot off the press:
Mr. Allen was twice my age, with light brown hair turning to salt and pepper. But he had quite a few things going for him: he was rich, he was brilliant, and most importantly, he was my boss.
The fact that he was married hardly fazed me. My own parents divorced when I was twelve when my dad had an affair, and I survived just fine, thankyouverymuch. From that experience, I learned that there is no such thing as true love.
Lust, on the other hand? Oh, I believe in lust more than I believe in God. I’m a horny…
The first time Andrew brought Kelsey home to meet us, my jaw dropped. And then I cursed under my breath. The girl was hot as fuck. Nice tits, a pert little ass, innocent hazel eyes, and long, wavy red hair.
Frankly, she was exactly my type.
To make matters worse, Kelsey had a great personality to match her looks. She could charm the socks off of a sock monkey.
I had a tough time being around this lovely young lady anytime she came around to visit with my son. I’m a grown-ass man, after all, so I can usually control…
The first time I heard Grace’s audition tape, I knew there was something special about her. She was applying to be a piano major at the university where I teach piano performance. Her playing stopped me in my tracks.
I had countless students flow in and out of my life over the last twenty years, and only a tiny handful of them had ever impressed me. I knew I needed to enroll this young lady ASAP and began pulling some strings to get her the biggest scholarship I could find.
And then I actually met her. And that is when…
It begins on a rainy day in June. She walks home from the bookstore she works at to find an unstamped envelope in her mailbox. Opening it, she finds a little note written on plain white notepaper. It reads:
Roses are red, violets are blue…
No one is as beautiful as you
Your Secret Admirer.
She’s intrigued and immediately runs through the list of men in her life. It has to be someone who knows where she lives, clearly.
It’s not a very long list.
Look. It’s time to wake up and smell the dead, rotting roses. One or more of the following scenarios has been insidiously happening in your bedroom for a number of years now, but you have either ignored, denied, or not noticed:
A. Your spouse is a top-level asshole.
Are your friends and family constantly pointing out your spouse’s bad behavior to you? Are you sick of defending your spouse? If so, let me tell you the truth right now: The problem lies with your spouse, not the people complaining about them.
B. You’re not getting any.
You try and try for…
When my spinal surgeon tells me that I’m okayed to start easing back into physical activity again at my six-month check-up, I’m ecstatic. Until he says that the only two he recommends, for now, are yoga or tai chi. Nothing more strenuous than that for a few more months.
Before my surgery, I was athletic my whole life. I ran, swam, biked, lifted weights, and did MMA. Yoga and tai chi? Isn’t one for moms and the other for elderly people at parks?
I’m pretty depressed on the way home, and I allow myself one night to wallow. But the…
When my boss invited me over to his house for dinner along with a couple of my other colleagues, I was ecstatic, knowing my plan was working. On the email invite, it said for us to bring our swimsuits for the hot tub. I shivered with anticipation, thinking of all the things I could do to him in there.
I’d only been working at this company for a few months, and I was the low woman on the totem pole, but I had big plans, ambitious plans. …
The best and worst thing I ever did in college was to pledge Zeta Rho. Actually, scratch that. The best and worst thing I ever did in college was to fuck Professor Harding. But really, both of those things are connected, and I finally feel ready to confess everything that happened.
It’s time to own up to my part in the trail of destruction I left behind me.
It was my sophomore year at a certain Ivy League university, and I was excited to finally be able to follow in my older sister Maren’s footsteps. She’d attended my college a…
He picks her up at 6:22pm. He’s eight minutes early, something he knows she will appreciate. She’s all dolled up in a tight, sexy, red dress that hugs her in all the right places and has an intriguing gold front zipper that stops right below her bust. He’s instantly glad he wore his nicest suit tonight. He glances at himself in the rearview mirror as she slides her tight ass into his passenger seat and then tries very hard not to gawk at her.
They’re headed to their company holiday party as work besties. His wife is out of town…